From 77c56f9289a25c1eb9ee311fb9fa085c7d7298be Mon Sep 17 00:00:00 2001 From: Madison Scott-Clary Date: Fri, 25 Oct 2019 07:50:15 -0700 Subject: [PATCH] Editing --- content/self-harm/suicide/013.md | 4 ++-- 1 file changed, 2 insertions(+), 2 deletions(-) diff --git a/content/self-harm/suicide/013.md b/content/self-harm/suicide/013.md index 070a607..c004e3e 100644 --- a/content/self-harm/suicide/013.md +++ b/content/self-harm/suicide/013.md @@ -15,7 +15,7 @@ I think a long ways. > You think? -Well, every time I think I've come a long ways, I do something horribly stupid again. Every time I think I'm over all this, I tear at myself. Every time I think I'm getting good at talking about my mental health, I wind up in this pit where I have to destroy myself, to make it physically evident that I'm unwell in some invisible way. I always have. I tried to blind myself in 1996, remember? I tried to lose a finger, a leg. I cut. I burned. +Well, every time I think I've come a long ways, I do something horribly stupid again. Every time I think I'm over all this, I tear at myself. Every time I think I'm getting good at talking about my mental health, I wind up in this pit where I have to destroy myself, to make it physically evident that I'm unwell in some invisible way. I always have. I tried to blind myself when I was ten, remember? I tried to lose a finger, a leg. I cut. I burned. > Is it about proving that you're unwell? @@ -29,7 +29,7 @@ I still think about it on the daily. I still obsess over it. Now I'm more likely No, of course not, but look, I'm thirty-three. I'm too old for it to be tragic, too young for it to be a midlife crisis, too healthy for it to be understandable, too sick for it to be a surprise. It would just be sad and weird, not to mention mean to those in my life. I've got that perspective now. I'm thirty-three, I've made it this far, I've worked this hard, and I can at least understand that. -It's easier to just go to bed and wait it out, because yeah, it still blows, but at least now I know it'll pass, and five months down the line, I can do the same dance all over again. +It's easier to just go to bed and wait it out, or maybe just get out the soldering iron for a bit, because yeah, it still blows, but at least now I know it'll pass, and five months down the line, I can do the same dance all over again. > That seems rather fatalistic.