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Madison Scott-Clary
2020-01-21 08:52:30 -08:00
parent 82aa2d89ce
commit b95bd11c4d
10 changed files with 38 additions and 20 deletions

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@ -11,13 +11,13 @@ Why does it not feel bad?
> No. Why do you feel it important to add that?
Because to do so would do a disservice to my years trying to be sexually active. They weren't bad years, and I did have some success at it.
Because to not do so would do a disservice to my years trying to be sexually active. They weren't bad years, and I did have some success at it.
JD and I eventually got together. We had a good amount of sex. We went to the Underground parties --- orgies, really --- and had lots of fun there. Bel and I had a good amount of sex, and it was pretty good. I looked forward to seeing them, simply because the sex was pretty good, as well as because they were good friends.
> So if the sex was pretty good, if I still had a lot of fun playing around with your husband, why did you stop? Why did you eventually remove your choice in the matter and chemically castrate yourself?
> So if the sex was pretty good, if you still had a lot of fun playing around with your husband, why did you stop? Why did you eventually remove your choice in the matter and chemically castrate yourself?
Because I resented needing sex. It was insatiable, yet it seemed to me to be no more than a puerile affliction, like baby teeth.
Perhaps because I resented needing sex. I was insatiable, yet it seemed to me to be no more than a puerile affliction, like baby teeth.
I resented how I shared so many wonderful and complete sexual interactions with people when my own body was not involved. I resented how how good sex *could* be and yet never was. I resented how easy it was for some people to have good sex when, for me, even at my freest, I was so rarely able to manage much more than a confused, anxious jumble of physical interaction that was driven so often by the mere need to ejaculate.