Marsh

marsh/content/004.tex

@@ -4,7 +4,7 @@ At some point while I'd slept, Hanne had once more split the bed into two separa
 
 Coffee and chicory, nearly a third oatmilk by volume. Perfect.
 
-I was two sips in when the weight of what happened hit me once again. I didn't quite know how it was that they had escaped me in those minutes after waking, but a pile of `how could I' questions started to hem me in again --- how could I possibly forget, when this is the biggest thing that has happened to our clade ever? Never mind sys-side or phys-side; ever.
+I was two sips in when the weight of what happened hit me once again. I didn't quite know how it was that they had escaped me in those minutes after waking, but a pile of `how could I' questions started to hem me in again—how could I possibly forget, when this is the biggest thing that has happened to our clade ever? Never mind sys-side or phys-side; ever.
 
 I forced myself to sit up in bed and drink my coffee. I set myself the goal of sipping until it was finished. I stared out the window for a bit. I cried for a bit. I drank about half my coffee before the wait became unbearable.
 
@@ -30,7 +30,7 @@ There was mirth on the other end, some barely-sensed laughter that didn't quite
 
 \emph{``I'm feeling like shit.''} I laughed, shaking my head. \emph{``I mean, of course I am. I'm some awful mix of mourning Marsh, hopeful that there's some solution, kicking myself for mourning them maybe preemptively, kicking myself for not doing more, and just plain confused.''}
 
-The Odists were an old clade --- far older than any of us, having been born decades before the advent of the System --- so it was no wonder that Dry Grass was far more adept at sensorium messages than anyone else I'd met. It wasn't that I saw her lean back in her chair, nor that I felt the act of leaning back myself, but the overwhelming sensation that I got from that moment of silence was of her sighing, leaning back, crossing her arms over her front. I had no clue how she managed to pull that off. \emph{``There is little that I can say to fix any one of those, and anything else would ring hollow. All I can do is validate that, damn, Reed, that is a shitload of emotions. There is a lot going on, and I do not blame you for feeling confused.''}
+The Odists were an old clade—far older than any of us, having been born decades before the advent of the System—so it was no wonder that Dry Grass was far more adept at sensorium messages than anyone else I'd met. It wasn't that I saw her lean back in her chair, nor that I felt the act of leaning back myself, but the overwhelming sensation that I got from that moment of silence was of her sighing, leaning back, crossing her arms over her front. I had no clue how she managed to pull that off. \emph{``There is little that I can say to fix any one of those, and anything else would ring hollow. All I can do is validate that, damn, Reed, that is a shitload of emotions. There is a lot going on, and I do not blame you for feeling confused.''}
 
 \emph{``Thanks,''} I responded, feeling no small amount of relief that she hadn't tried to dig into any one of those feelings, nor even all of them as a whole. \emph{``How are Tule and Cress holding up? Hell, how're you holding up?''}
 
@@ -42,7 +42,7 @@ The Odists were an old clade --- far older than any of us, having been born deca
 
 I finished my coffee in two coarse swallows, winced at the uncomfortable sensation that followed. I took another moment to stand up and start making the bed again. As I did, I asked, \emph{``What on? I saw a ton of forks.''}
 
-The sense of a nod, and then, \emph{``Several things. One of me is still keeping tallies on how many are missing based on reports, which appears to be some few million so far. Another of me is collating the varied types of posts on the feeds --- wild supposition, unchecked grief, confusion, and so on. Another is speaking to a member of the eighth stanza, even though--''}
+The sense of a nod, and then, \emph{``Several things. One of me is still keeping tallies on how many are missing based on reports, which appears to be some few million so far. Another of me is collating the varied types of posts on the feeds—wild supposition, unchecked grief, confusion, and so on. Another is speaking to a member of the eighth stanza, even though--''}
 
 \emph{``This `Need An Answer' you mentioned?''}
 
@@ -64,7 +64,7 @@ I hesitated, halfway through smoothing out the sheets. \emph{``Oh, uh\ldots alri
 
 She sent the address of a public sim, to which I sent a ping of acknowledgement and a suggestion of five minutes' time.
 
-Hanne sat at the dining room table, coffee in her hands, staring out at nothing, a sure sign that she was digging through something on the perisystem architecture. Probably poking her way through the feeds, looking for news. She had her own friends, after all, her own circle of co-hobbyists, those construct artists --- oneirotects --- who shared her interest in creating various objects and interactive constructs. She had her own people to care about that weren't just me, weren't just the Marshans.
+Hanne sat at the dining room table, coffee in her hands, staring out at nothing, a sure sign that she was digging through something on the perisystem architecture. Probably poking her way through the feeds, looking for news. She had her own friends, after all, her own circle of co-hobbyists, those construct artists—oneirotects—who shared her interest in creating various objects and interactive constructs. She had her own people to care about that weren't just me, weren't just the Marshans.
 
 I chose to make us another pot of coffee instead, letting a cone of silence linger above me so that I didn't disturb her, even though her eyes did flick up toward me once or twice, joined by a weak smile.
 
@@ -150,11 +150,11 @@ I frowned. ``You mean someone's keeping her from doing so?''
 
 ``It is a hunch. Perhaps her implants limit her by NDA. Perhaps our communications are being monitored, and she is being instructed to limit the topics or to act in this way. While talking with Need An Answer, she suggested that this is also what the eighth stanza is used to doing, but they are the political ones.''
 
-I dredged up what history of the System I had learned, all of those sensationalist stories about the few old clades steering the direction of the lives of however many billions of uploaded minds and their instances --- certainly well over two trillion, if one counted the two launch vehicles, Castor and Pollux that had been sent zooming out of the Solar System at incredible speed seventy five years prior. More, if what Hanne said was right.
+I dredged up what history of the System I had learned, all of those sensationalist stories about the few old clades steering the direction of the lives of however many billions of uploaded minds and their instances—certainly well over two trillion, if one counted the two launch vehicles, Castor and Pollux that had been sent zooming out of the Solar System at incredible speed seventy five years prior. More, if what Hanne said was right.
 
 ``And they'd be sneaky like this, too?'' I asked.
 
-A snort of laughter and she nodded. ``Sneaky is one way to put it, yes. They shape interactions by second nature, for which a portion of the clade has distanced themselves from them. We --- Hammered Silver's up-tree instances --- are not supposed to be speaking to any of them, but there are a few that I like plenty, and given our current status, I have begun interacting more openly with Need An Answer.''
+A snort of laughter and she nodded. ``Sneaky is one way to put it, yes. They shape interactions by second nature, for which a portion of the clade has distanced themselves from them. We—Hammered Silver's up-tree instances—are not supposed to be speaking to any of them, but there are a few that I like plenty, and given our current status, I have begun interacting more openly with Need An Answer.''
 
 Wary of letting the topic drift too far, I said, ``Have they gotten anything else from phys-side, then?''
 
@@ -204,7 +204,7 @@ She nodded.
 
 ``Oh, absolutely,'' Dry Grass replied, turning and leaning over to give Cress a kiss on its cheek. ``How are you feeling, loves?''
 
-``Terrible,'' Tule said cheerfully. They had apparently collected Rush and Sedge before arriving, as all four stood in almost identical postures, each holding their coffees in their right hand --- just, I realized, as I was doing. ``All my emotions are wrong. I'm jittery and tired and I want to get another few hours of sleep but feel guilty every time I lay down.''
+``Terrible,'' Tule said cheerfully. They had apparently collected Rush and Sedge before arriving, as all four stood in almost identical postures, each holding their coffees in their right hand—just, I realized, as I was doing. ``All my emotions are wrong. I'm jittery and tired and I want to get another few hours of sleep but feel guilty every time I lay down.''
 
 I laughed. ``Yeah, that sounds about right. I keep feeling like I'm having the wrong sort of reaction to all of this.''
 
@@ -212,7 +212,7 @@ I laughed. ``Yeah, that sounds about right. I keep feeling like I'm having the w
 
 A moment of silence followed.
 
-``We as people have fallen out of the habit of dealing with crises,'' she continued when we all averted our gazes. ``Do not be hard on yourselves. We --- the Ode clade --- have more experience with crises than the vast, vast majority of the System, and even we are reeling. We are struggling to internalize something this big.''
+``We as people have fallen out of the habit of dealing with crises,'' she continued when we all averted our gazes. ``Do not be hard on yourselves. We—the Ode clade—have more experience with crises than the vast, vast majority of the System, and even we are reeling. We are struggling to internalize something this big.''
 
 ``Have you lost any?'' Cress asked, and I thanked it silently for getting to the question before I worked up the courage to do so myself.
 
@@ -228,13 +228,13 @@ All of the designs seemed to feature the New Year, now that I was able to pick t
 
 I turned away with a hollow feeling in my chest, wondering just how many of those couples were still couples.
 
-The town, while no less visually chaotic than the beach, was at least more heartening to look at. Everything --- \emph{everything;} the walls of buildings, the roofs, doors and window shutters, even the roads --- was covered with a blindingly colorful mosaic of tiles.
+The town, while no less visually chaotic than the beach, was at least more heartening to look at. Everything—\emph{everything;} the walls of buildings, the roofs, doors and window shutters, even the roads—was covered with a blindingly colorful mosaic of tiles.
 
-``\emph{To Limáni Ton Khromáton} is nearly two centuries old,'' Dry Grass explained as we started trudging up one of those streets. ``When you enter, you are given a single tile --- if you check your pockets, it should be in there.''
+``\emph{To Limáni Ton Khromáton} is nearly two centuries old,'' Dry Grass explained as we started trudging up one of those streets. ``When you enter, you are given a single tile—if you check your pockets, it should be in there.''
 
 Sure enough, when I dug my hand into my pocket, I found a cerulean tile, a little square of porcelain about three centimeters on a side. The rest of the Marshans dug in their pockets and pulled out tiles of their own, all one shade or another of blue.
 
-``Unless you hold a color in your mind when you enter, you are provided with your favorite,'' Dry Grass explained. She pulled a golden yellow tile out of her own pocket and flipped it up in the air like a coin. ``All of this --- all of the mosaic --- has been placed by visitors.
+``Unless you hold a color in your mind when you enter, you are provided with your favorite,'' Dry Grass explained. She pulled a golden yellow tile out of her own pocket and flipped it up in the air like a coin. ``All of this—all of the mosaic—has been placed by visitors.
 
 ``Set No Stones told me about this place.'' She smiled wryly. ``Because of course she did. We are consummate pros at living up to our names. You may place your tile wherever you like, and so long as it is touching the edge of another, it will stick. You will not be able to remove it after, so make sure to place it carefully.''
 
@@ -250,7 +250,7 @@ We walked past buildings that depicted animals, some that depicted people, some
 
 If the small town sim had been relatively quiet, this one felt all but abandoned. Perhaps all such sims with a singular purpose would be like this today: if your friends are missing, if other versions of you were missing, then an attraction would doubtless lose some of its draw. We passed only a few tilers tramping up the hill with determination, ready to place their colors for the day.
 
-Finally, Dry Grass led us down an alleyway, dim and cool, and gestured to a wall. The scene was of two figures sitting at a bar. Given the scale, it was impossible to make out any detail on the figures, though they seemed to be furries of some sort --- one tan and one black and white. Each had a drink, and before them, a wall of bottles stood, still in the process of being built. Dry Grass stood up on her tiptoes and touched her tile to the edge of a bottle, adding a bright glow to a fledgling bottle of whiskey.
+Finally, Dry Grass led us down an alleyway, dim and cool, and gestured to a wall. The scene was of two figures sitting at a bar. Given the scale, it was impossible to make out any detail on the figures, though they seemed to be furries of some sort—one tan and one black and white. Each had a drink, and before them, a wall of bottles stood, still in the process of being built. Dry Grass stood up on her tiptoes and touched her tile to the edge of a bottle, adding a bright glow to a fledgling bottle of whiskey.
 
 ``Here,'' she said, gesturing us to grab a crate that had been stacked nearby. ``All of these are just props to help people reach higher. You can probably add your blues to the edge of the lamp. They are not quite the right color for green lamps, but I do not care.''
 
@@ -286,7 +286,7 @@ I startled back to awareness, smiling sheepishly at Sedge, accepting the hand th
 
 ``It is okay,'' Dry Grass said, smiling gently to me. ``The next sim that we are headed to does not have a very large entry point, so please huddle in closer. It will also be quite warm, so, fair warning.''
 
-The entry point --- a platform of wood slats set upon stilts above stagnant water --- was far smaller than I had anticipated, and my foot rocked against an uneven plank set along the rim of the platform, forcing me to lean against Sedge. One edge of the platform led into a narrow, somewhat rickety wooden walkway that headed out over the water in a straight line until it came upon a tall patch of grass, where it turned a few degrees to the right to make its way to another. It appeared to meander in this way from island of vegetation to island of vegetation in an uneven zigzag toward a copse of trees --- the word `banyan' floated to mind, though I wasn't sure if that was actually the case --- where it disappeared into shadow.
+The entry point—a platform of wood slats set upon stilts above stagnant water—was far smaller than I had anticipated, and my foot rocked against an uneven plank set along the rim of the platform, forcing me to lean against Sedge. One edge of the platform led into a narrow, somewhat rickety wooden walkway that headed out over the water in a straight line until it came upon a tall patch of grass, where it turned a few degrees to the right to make its way to another. It appeared to meander in this way from island of vegetation to island of vegetation in an uneven zigzag toward a copse of trees—the word `banyan' floated to mind, though I wasn't sure if that was actually the case—where it disappeared into shadow.
 
 That shade looked delightfully appealing as the humid heat pressed in around us.
 
@@ -296,13 +296,13 @@ That shade looked delightfully appealing as the humid heat pressed in around us.
 
 If it had been intended to be a joke, it fell flat. We remained in silence for a few awkward moments.
 
-She sighed. ``My apologies. It is still important to me, however. It is-- Ah, there she is.'' She raised an arm and waved to a figure crouched at the edge of the walkway just before the next platform. With the heat-haze and mugginess, their form was somewhat indistinct. They wore a frowzy white dress, along with some sort of hat --- or perhaps a rather tall hairstyle. As we walked toward them in single file, she explained, ``This sim was designed by Serene; Sustained And Sustaining, whom you shall meet in a moment. She is my cocladist from the ninth stanza, and one of my favorite people in the world. I asked her to meet us here.''
+She sighed. ``My apologies. It is still important to me, however. It is-- Ah, there she is.'' She raised an arm and waved to a figure crouched at the edge of the walkway just before the next platform. With the heat-haze and mugginess, their form was somewhat indistinct. They wore a frowzy white dress, along with some sort of hat—or perhaps a rather tall hairstyle. As we walked toward them in single file, she explained, ``This sim was designed by Serene; Sustained And Sustaining, whom you shall meet in a moment. She is my cocladist from the ninth stanza, and one of my favorite people in the world. I asked her to meet us here.''
 
 As we got closer, the strange hairstyle that I had noticed on the figure resolved into a pair of tall canid ears, and what I had assumed was a mask of some sort turned out to be a short, pointed muzzle. Serene stood up and stretched, smiling wanly to us before bowing in greeting.
 
 ``Serene, this is Tule and Cress, my partners, as well as a few more of their clade: Reed, Rush, and Sedge.''
 
-The fox --- a hunch confirmed by a quick check of the perisystem --- nodded. ``Of the Marsh clade? How droll,'' she said, that smile veering perilously close to a smirk. ``Welcome to my own little marsh.''
+The fox—a hunch confirmed by a quick check of the perisystem—nodded. ``Of the Marsh clade? How droll,'' she said, that smile veering perilously close to a smirk. ``Welcome to my own little marsh.''
 
 ``What \emph{is} this place?'' Rush asked, a note of wonder in vis voice. ``Other than a swamp, I mean.''
 
@@ -316,7 +316,7 @@ Serene nodded and started strolling down the path toward the next patch of grass
 
 ``I would like to hear what you are seeing.''
 
-The fox --- a fennec, the System told me --- nodded slowly. ``I am seeing quiet chaos. I am seeing most of my sims emptying out. Few are out for walks or adventures. I sent forks to each of them when I noticed my own missing instances to ensure that they all still existed, as well. Thankfully, sims seem to be unaffected.
+The fox—a fennec, the System told me—nodded slowly. ``I am seeing quiet chaos. I am seeing most of my sims emptying out. Few are out for walks or adventures. I sent forks to each of them when I noticed my own missing instances to ensure that they all still existed, as well. Thankfully, sims seem to be unaffected.
 
 ``The ones that are not empty, however, remain dreadfully quiet. Most of those who are out and about have set up over themselves cones of silence.'' She hesitated, took a deep breath, and then continued. ``Those who have not, though, are decidedly not quiet. More than one silence has been broken by weeping and wailing.''
 
@@ -406,7 +406,7 @@ The other category seemed to be made mostly of furries of some sort. These, at l
 
 I nodded and started to reply before cutting myself off as a few more Odists showed up in quick succession. Another skunk, looking far more prim and proper than the others, arrived and shot Dry Grass a quick glance. I couldn't quite read her expression, but she certainly didn't look happy. If she was this Then I Must In All Ways Be Earnest, it perhaps made sense, as the next Odist to arrive was a human introduced as The Only Time I Dream Is When I Need An Answer.
 
-From what I gathered both from my knowledge of the history of the System that I'd picked up over my years on Lagrange as well as the memories of Tule's relationship with Dry Grass, there had been a schism within the Ode clade some fifty years back surrounding the political elements of the clade --- of which Need An Answer was one --- and those who disagreed. This included the stanzas to which both Dry Grass and In All Ways belonged. Beyond those such as Lily who held resentment, even some Odists mistrusted --- or hated --- some of their own.
+From what I gathered both from my knowledge of the history of the System that I'd picked up over my years on Lagrange as well as the memories of Tule's relationship with Dry Grass, there had been a schism within the Ode clade some fifty years back surrounding the political elements of the clade—of which Need An Answer was one—and those who disagreed. This included the stanzas to which both Dry Grass and In All Ways belonged. Beyond those such as Lily who held resentment, even some Odists mistrusted—or hated—some of their own.
 
 I just hoped they'd be able to set that aside for now.
 
@@ -416,9 +416,9 @@ Scattered mumbling.
 
 ``Dry Grass, you have been taking point. Would you like to begin?''
 
-``Yes,'' she said, stepping out in front of the loose crowd that had gathered. All turned to face her. ``At midnight on January first, 2400 --- that is, systime 276+1, but some are speculating that the phys-side date is related for reasons that I will get to --- a disruption in the software underlying the System occurred. This led to a discontinuity of approximately one year, one month, and ten days.''
+``Yes,'' she said, stepping out in front of the loose crowd that had gathered. All turned to face her. ``At midnight on January first, 2400—that is, systime 276+1, but some are speculating that the phys-side date is related for reasons that I will get to—a disruption in the software underlying the System occurred. This led to a discontinuity of approximately one year, one month, and ten days.''
 
-More muttering --- darkly, this time.
+More muttering—darkly, this time.
 
 ``There have been more than two hundred thousand instances of downtime throughout the history of Lagrange. Most amount to a few seconds or minutes, with the longest being approximately three weeks, which took place during the Lagrange station's insertion into the L5 orbit in which it currently resides. We usually do not notice any downtime unless we are specifically paying attention to systime. However, in this instance, when the System returned to functionality, several instances were missing--''
 
@@ -426,7 +426,7 @@ More muttering --- darkly, this time.
 
 ``--several instances were missing. At current count, the missing instances number about one and a half billion, though that number continues to climb.
 
-``I have re-acquired my systech credentials through an expedited process, which has led to me talking to a phys-side tech on the Lagrange station named Günay Sadık. While she appears to be somewhat restrained in what she is willing --- or able --- to tell me, she was at least able to confirm or deny guesses as I made them. She has confirmed that the missing instances are due to corrupted data, that Lagrange experienced full downtime, and that phys-side engineers were finally able to get it running at full capacity just last night.''
+``I have re-acquired my systech credentials through an expedited process, which has led to me talking to a phys-side tech on the Lagrange station named Günay Sadık. While she appears to be somewhat restrained in what she is willing—or able—to tell me, she was at least able to confirm or deny guesses as I made them. She has confirmed that the missing instances are due to corrupted data, that Lagrange experienced full downtime, and that phys-side engineers were finally able to get it running at full capacity just last night.''
 
 Dry Grass paused, taking a deep breath. ``Here are the things she was not able to confirm, but which I do not believe were outright denials. She was not able to confirm the reason for the downtime and did not respond to any of my guesses. However, as this discussion took place over AVEC, I was able to see her as she spoke. I asked if there was any physical damage to the System hardware: no change. I asked if there was any permanent damage to the System internals: no change. I asked if there was any trouble phys-side that led to the downtime: she looked down to her hands on the desk. Finally, I asked if this downtime might have been intentional, whether there might have been malice behind it: she looked off-screen, her expression appearing tense, perhaps frightened. I suspect an NDA block on her implants. I have heard these are uncomfortable at best.''
 
@@ -490,7 +490,7 @@ At this, Beholden let out a cry and burst suddenly into tears, eventually rollin
 
 ``Do we have enough information to ask about whether or not they'll be recoverable?'' Cress asked. ``Serene said we'd need some questions answered first.''
 
-Dry Grass tilted her head thoughtfully. ``None of my forks have reported any success along that front. Most, however, are still processing. When I asked Günay, she simply shrugged and said,''I do not know. Perhaps there is something that can be done with more hands sys-side, but best efforts were made in recovering lost data.''\,''
+Dry Grass tilted her head thoughtfully. ``None of my forks have reported any success along that front. Most, however, are still processing. When I asked Günay, she simply shrugged and said, ``I do not know. Perhaps there is something that can be done with more hands sys-side, but best efforts were made in recovering lost data.''\hspace{1pt}''
 
 ``Are any of your forks working on that, love?''
 
@@ -528,9 +528,9 @@ Another long pause, and then a sense of a nod.
 
 A few moments after I sent her the address of the sim, she popped into being beside me, looking freshly showered. Her expression was flat and motions stiff as she walked with me to join the rest of the clade in the pagoda. Even as the rest of the Marshans greeted her, she simply nodded, saying nothing.
 
-If I'd been expecting us all to jump into conversation, I was disappointed. However, there was still relief when we fell back into silence, each thinking our thoughts, looking out over the pasture at the fog and the shadows of sheep. The only sounds were those of the sim --- a hint of rain further out on the grass, another tinkle or two of a bell --- and my own breathing.
+If I'd been expecting us all to jump into conversation, I was disappointed. However, there was still relief when we fell back into silence, each thinking our thoughts, looking out over the pasture at the fog and the shadows of sheep. The only sounds were those of the sim—a hint of rain further out on the grass, another tinkle or two of a bell—and my own breathing.
 
-Once more, questions bubbled up within me. What could I possibly do in the face of such enormity? How could 48 billion people just disappear? What was phys-side doing about all of this other than hiding the details they doubtless had? More 'how could I's dogging my heels --- how could I be sitting here in silence? How could I have stepped away from Dry Grass, the one person I knew who was working hardest on this? How could I not have looped Lily into this whole conversation?
+Once more, questions bubbled up within me. What could I possibly do in the face of such enormity? How could 48 billion people just disappear? What was phys-side doing about all of this other than hiding the details they doubtless had? More 'how could I's dogging my heels—how could I be sitting here in silence? How could I have stepped away from Dry Grass, the one person I knew who was working hardest on this? How could I not have looped Lily into this whole conversation?
 
 ``So,'' Lily said. ``What's up?''
 
@@ -552,7 +552,7 @@ She shrugged. ``Not none, I'm sure.''
 
 ``Ye-e-es,'' I allowed. ``So maybe it was a virus or something. CPV that affects everyone doesn't exist, does it?''
 
-Silence and headshakes around the pagoda. The contraproprioceptive virus --- the one sure way to kill anyone on the System --- only seemed to work when tailored specifically to an individual's sensorium, disrupting their sense of proprioception until they either dissipated and crashed or quit out of agony. Not only that, but, from what I'd learned from the stories that came out surrounding it a few decades back, it had to somehow pierce the skin, to breach that sense of physical integrity, before it could do it's awful job of unwinding a person entirely.
+Silence and headshakes around the pagoda. The contraproprioceptive virus—the one sure way to kill anyone on the System—only seemed to work when tailored specifically to an individual's sensorium, disrupting their sense of proprioception until they either dissipated and crashed or quit out of agony. Not only that, but, from what I'd learned from the stories that came out surrounding it a few decades back, it had to somehow pierce the skin, to breach that sense of physical integrity, before it could do it's awful job of unwinding a person entirely.
 
 ``Well, if this\ldots attack or whatever was deliberate and we don't know anything about \emph{how} it was done, do we know anything about who might have done it?''
 
@@ -562,7 +562,7 @@ Sedge leaned forward, resting her elbows on her knees. ``There's always been a b
 
 ``I'm not sure they think of us as people.''
 
-Lily snorted. ``\,`Not as people','' she sneered. ``Sorry, Sedge, I know it's not on you. You're probably right. I'm just feeling like shit now.''
+Lily snorted. ``\hspace{1pt}`Not as people','' she sneered. ``Sorry, Sedge, I know it's not on you. You're probably right. I'm just feeling like shit now.''
 
 Rush smiled faintly. ``I think we all are.''